I love a good thriller. Combining the best elements of mystery/whodunit flicks with sex, violence and frequently unlikely plot twists – they just tickle me in the brain meats and leave my claw well lubricated and dripping with happy goo.

That said, there’s usually some point in the narrative that makes me want to cough up my colon and leave it dangling from my mouth like wet, squirty, stinky fluffy dice.

Brian DePalma’s Body Double - great little thriller (with the infamous ‘nice lady gets drilled through the head’ sequence that genre fans and fictional American Psycho’s are so fond of) but the end, where the bad guy’s DOG knocks the killer into the stormwater drain?!

Crikey, Brian, did you hoover up a bad batch of coke that morning, son? Are there troubles at home, mate? Something you’d like to share with the group, tiger? Big fella? My ol’ Tacker?

Anyway, the point I’m staggering towards is, having an interactive thriller, one where I could have some say and control in how events transpired, would lubricate my JOY CLAW immensely.

Enter: Heavy Rain.

Pairing up two of my biggest passions: sitting on m’arse watching telly and sitting on m’arse playing video games, Heavy Rain will probably be referred to in the future as starting a brand spanking new sub-genre: the interactive thriller.

I have to admit, I was initially extremely sceptical about this one. The trailers made it look like a feature length quick-time event (you know, press the ‘square’ button when it flashes up, then the ‘triangle’ then flick the analogue stick left… and so on) and while there are indeed elements of this, The Claw is impressed.

The Claw is very impressed.

Gameplay wise, yes – it’s true, you’ll be pressing buttons when the game asks you to, and for the first twenty minutes or so of play you get to do exciting interactive things like:

• Take a piss (wheee!)
• Clean your teeth (scrub those incisors!)
• Tidy up (that’s how I know it’s not reality)
• Have a shower (see above)
• Dry yourself with a towel (this was actually a bit challenging, no joke, you have to shake the controller just so)

However I urge PS3 owners out there to continue on, because an hour or so in you’ll be hooked.

The narrative is split between a bunch of characters: a father who is haunted by the loss of one of his sons and subsequent kidnapping of his other one (nice parenting, Douche Dad!), an overweight Private Dick with a heart of gold (and yes he’s an ex-cop and has a drinking problem), a young male FBI agent who has both an awesome set of VR-glasses that can scan crime scenes, electronically compiling evidence and a massive drug habit plus a sexy chick who gets her tits out a lot.

[sniff] What? She does. Don’t look at me like that.

Quantic Dreams’ CEO David Cage directs this opus and the graphics, animation and overall mood are simply stunning. Yes, there are a few moments where the characters’ faces slip into the Uncanny Valley – but they’re in the minority. Overall this is slicker than a greasy piglet.

The main story involves the Origami Killer (yes, it sounds lame but shit gets hardcore later on) and the hunt for said killer, splitting the story between these characters.

Now Sony would sue the me within an inch of my life if I revealed actual plot points, but having gone through it a couple of times now, I have to say it’s the most compelling movie I’ve ever played.

Main characters can die and the story will continue, you can have happy endings, sad endings, weird endings – plus a whole bunch of deeply atmospheric sequences throughout.

Is this the future of gaming? I don’t know. I still like games where you run around dick-punching enemies to oblivion (Bayonetta, anyone?) but Heavy Rain may just be the bridge between gamer and movie geek.

And here at The Claw we’re all about bringing people together. Especially young, bi-curious women. But, you know, gamers and film fans too.

Suggested viewing: Dario Argento’s Deep Red, Brian DePalma’s Body Double and David Lynch’s Lost Highway.

Suggested playing: Quantic Dream’s previous “interesting failure” Fahrenheit. It’s no Heavy Rain but you can see where the inspiration came from.

Claw rating: 4 bleedy scratches out of 5